BMF National Rally

Well first things first, I thought we must all be mad to attempt the National Rally. Conclusion – we were mad. Still it was enjoyable but tiring both physically and mentally.

So the 8 brave souls met up at the Woolpack in Burgess Hill for the start of our epic voyage. The 8 brave souls being me (Darren Lucas), Kim Lucas with Clare Boyling as his pillion and Phil Lucas making up ‘Team Lucas’ and Mick Muspratt, Gordon Campbell and Paul Stevens with his son riding pillion making up the other team.

The route of 540 miles looked something like this. Starting at Burgess Hill we went to the following places: Guildford, Slough, Reading, Abingdon, Burford, Andoversford, Stratford On Avon, Deddington, Towcester, Dunchurch, Meriden, Bromsgrove, Worcester, Cleobury Mortimer, Leominster, Church Stretton, Sutton Maddock, Whitchurch, Stoke, Ashbourne and finally ending up at Uttoxeter Race Course.

It has to be said the trip was a very eventful one. The first few miles went by with no problem. Then we got lost in Staines on the way to Slough. You may laugh but there seems to be a lack of directional sigh in Staines but we found our way to Slough eventually.

The next problem encountered was a strange one between Burford and Andoversford. As we came along the road we saw a police car in the middle of the road with blue lights flashing. My first thought was bugger, hope there hasn’t been an accident, don’t fancy working out another route. However our luck was in as he called me to pull up to him, ‘it’s okay’ he said, ‘there’s a wide load coming though but you should be okay on you bikes’. Mind you he didn’t half give Phil a funny look because of his can! Phil just smiled and rode off. Now this wide load – you don’t expect to see a plane coming towards you down a road do you? Nor did we. Me and Phil got by okay but it was a bit of a struggle for dad on his Pan. Good thing we weren’t following it as the traffic jam was about 2 miles long behind it. At least we had an empty road for a blast down to Andoversford.

Ah yes! Andoversford!. We all take the mick out of West Country folk but trust me the 2 blokes manning this control were your typical stereotype yokels. All they needed was the straw hanging out of the corner of their mouths. They weren’t very bright either. ‘can we take our break here?’ I asked, the reply was ‘I don’t know, you can if you want but you’ve had your card stamped already so no, not really but if you like there is a Little Chef back up the road where you can take it’. Confused? So were we. ‘yes but will you stamp my card saying that I’ve taken it?’ I asked, ‘oh no your card don’t need to be stamped, we’ve already done that’. In the end we gave up and went to the Little Chef anyway and met up with the other guys.

Next stop Stratford, they stamped our card for us saying we had our break. We had a 40 minute rest here as the control didn’t open until 10pm. So it was a quick nap to get ready for the over night riding. Being the navigator for my team I didn’t get much sleep as I was going through the next lot of routes so I knew where we were going. The over night ride was pretty uneventful. It was fun having a empty motorway to blast down 3 abreast, oh I did make a wrong turn in Worcester looking for signs for Kidderminster, ended up going the wrong way down a one way street! Mind you it was 3am and there was no traffic around. Phil kind of shook his head and shouted ‘what you doing?’.

Next stop Cleobury Mortimer. We took our second rest stop here. It was hard to sleep as it was 4am, the birds were singing and bikes were coming and going.

The next event you should ask Phil about – no I’ll tell you. There I was blasting my way along the Ludlow by-pass and when I looked in my mirror I couldn’t see the other two! I pulled over and waited for a few minutes, no still not there so I turned round and went back. What did I find? Phil cursing and swearing at the side of the road. ‘Oh dear’ I thought, ‘his exhaust has fallen off’. I tried not to laugh as this was a serious mater. So while Phil and dad fixed the bike, I had a ciggie or 2 while looking at the maps, trying to work out where I could take short cuts to make up lost time. Still, after 40 minutes hammering away, the problem was solved.

Then we got lost trying to find the Whitchurch control. It wasn’t marked very clearly. We spotted several lost bikers trying to find the place but we got there in the end. ‘More lost time’ I thought, ‘but we can still make it to Uttoxeter on time’.

Famous last words those! We got to Stoke on time, quick time check, about 1 hour left, no problem. Bugger – my bike won’t start. No God – please don’t do this to me now, I’m nearly there! More swearing, this time from me, bike stripped down, no can’t find anything wrong,

quick call to Mick for his advice, no tried all that, bugger, time is running out. Right – lets bump start my bike and get to Uttoxeter as fast as possible. The time is 10.20am as we sign in for the last time, the last 3 riders to do so but worth it. I am totally shattered along with everyone else. A quick check on mine and Phil’s bikes found that one of my lugs on my battery has snapped, hence why it won’t start. Just as well we have gaff tape with us. Tape the lug terminal up and it’s as good as new. Now for the 200 miles home. 3 stops on the way home for petrol, food and sleep.

I’ve got my trophy at home as a reminder of the epic that was the National Rally 2003. Will I ever do it again? Not for a long time. It was fun and you go to meet some characters along the way. Everyone I met gave each other advice and encouragement. It’s events kike this that make you notice how close the motorcycling community is.

Lastly, thanks to Mick, Paul and Gordon for planning the routes and everyone who text me through the night to help keep spirits up. My advice to anyone thinking about doing it in the future – go for it, it may be hard work but it’s also fun, the only way to explain it is for you to do it yourself.

Darren Lucas

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